What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
