didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
There are leaves in my underwear?
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