i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize