Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Vodka?
Forever.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
