how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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