I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
