I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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