Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
