I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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