i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
