just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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