it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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