no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
