cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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