i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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