Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
