if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just cropdusted the office
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I touched a dick in church today
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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