Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
