just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
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