Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
