think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize