Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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