people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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