I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
