It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
