I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
