your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
