Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
