Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize