Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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