You really coming over, don't trick.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
