It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
