forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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