I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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