do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I would ride that face into the sunset
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
