And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
