no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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