I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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