You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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