How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
