i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
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How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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