when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
