very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
