do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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