i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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