he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
