this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Randomize