we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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