He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
