i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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