I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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